Every January, I think I have no friends

It’s mostly the cabin fever. And that everyone is sick. Or hibernating in bed. I live in #Chiberia, after all. (That’s what we call Chicago in the winter for those who don’t know).

But without fail. Every year. Around January. ….I THINK I HAVE NO FRIENDS. 

Zero. No friends. A friendless loser.
And not a cool loser like Beck. (#Beck jokes are still relevant right? Soy un perdedor, no?)

This pattern first came to my attention in 2012, when I called my mom a few weeks after New Year’s sobbing and saying that all my friends were MIA. I had lost them all. They were gonezo. Acting “extra” AF. Flair for the dramatic.

My mother explained that, apparently, I have shared this vulnerable, gut-wrenching statement with her every year, at the same time, right about in January.
This call has been made before.

As if the cold, harsh, winter weather wasn’t brutal enough. As if my inaugural sinus infection wasn’t crushing my spirit for a week this time of a year, like clockwork. Yup. I somehow manage to pile on to this shitstorm (and sometimes snowstorm) each and every 365 days with the same insecure mindset.

For those of you thinking, how do you convince yourself of this nonsense?

I have an easy-to-follow guide for doing just that:

  1. Stay in your apartment for at least 2 days straight
  2. Only talk to your friends who don’t live nearby, further convincing you that everyone has actually moved away from you
  3. Go on social media to see what your so-called “best friends” are actually up to, since they are not in fact spending time with you
  4. See that they are just living their lovely lives, trying to get by, recovering from the flu, and/or on vacation. Recall that you’ve seen most of them recently, and have plans to see the others in a couple days.
  6. Freak out in the comfort of your home while you put on a robe and face mask
  7. Go to call your mom in borderline teenage angst (emo songs blaring in your brain #mychemicalromance #dashboardconfessional #takingbacksunday )

But then…Stahp. Remember that: This call has been made before.

While I’m not fond of my annual habit, and regression in mindset that comes with it, even momentarily, it is always a positive upside that I end up remembering how to be grateful for the wonderful, badass, awesome women and men I call my friends.

After you’ve made your resolutions, and goals, and hit the gym again. Don’t forget to reflect on your support system and how amazing they all are.

And at the end of the day, go with my mom’s advice:


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